Tag Archive: GLBT

Exploring South Australia

Passport Magazine
Issue 15 – April 2003

GLOBETROTTING – Exploring South Australia

thornpark1If your idea of an Australian vacation is hanging out at the 24/7 gay bars of Sydney’s Oxford Street then South Australia is not for you. For my money, a vacation means getting away from the hustle and bustle and need to constantly do things, and the wine and hill country of the Clare and Barossa Valleys is a great option. I’m seriously into food, wine, and true relaxation, so I naturally put South Australia on my “must do” list. Exploring wineries, small farms, wildlife parks, and the countryside are just a few of the things that await the intrepid traveler.

I started my vacating by winging my way into Adelaide. Flights from the United States tend to connect through Melbourne or Sydney. You can also arrive by rail from either of those stopovers. The city proper is a square mile of only about 40,000 people, ringed by a manicured parkland. Just across a small river, North Adelaide is half the size and is the center of the main historic district with many beautiful homes and buildings worth exploring. Overall, Adelaide’s suburbs take up 140 square miles, populated by over a million people.

There are many places to stay in Adelaide, from small boutique hotels to modern luxury towers. Two places that exemplify this spectrum are The Embassy, a new luxury apartment tower on the North Terrace (www.pacifichotelscorporation.com.au), and the quirky Fire Station Inn in North Adelaide. The latter is a converted firehouse that rates five stars in most travel guides with huge, well appointed rooms, and, for the ground floor unit, a restored antique fire engine parked in the bedroom (www.adelaideheritage.com/firestation.html). This conjured up some interesting fantasies for me, as I never outgrew wanting to be a fireman.

A day or two to explore this city with its beautiful art museums, lively pub scene, and many fine dining restaurants gets the ball rolling. I spent a morning wandering the Central Market and its many food shops, including “Stall 55” that sells reasonably authentic “bush tucker” (indigenous Australian foods). I also viewed some of the more fascinating indigenous peoples’ exhibits at both the South Australian Museum and the Tandanya Art Gallery. If you’d like a truly personalized tour of the city and its bounty, touch base with Tourabout Adelaide where they can set you up with an individual guide. (www.touraboutadelaide.com.au)

Before long it was time to drop in at the Universal Wine Bar and have a glass or two of the local vino. One of Australia’s most famous chefs works the range at The Grange, a haute cuisine establishment that serves a unique tasting menu of love it or hate it fare. If you’re interested in a modern take on many of the unique ingredients of the Australian outback, drop in for dinner at Red Ochre, a floating restaurant on Torrens Lake, just off the North Terrace.

Perfect timing would have your visit coincide with Adelaide’s famed Feast. This is a gay and lesbian extravaganza of cultural, political and social events that takes place over a month-long period in late October and early November. Whether it’s a discussion group on gender identity, a picnic in the park, an evening of music, or a stunning drag show, everything and everyone is included. (www.feast.org.au)

natwinecenterBefore heading out to the countryside, a mandatory stop is the National Wine Centre of Australia which features a fascinating interactive museum dedicated to fermented grape juice and the people who make it. While there, drop in for a glass or two and a bite at de Castella’s, the Centre’s delightful restaurant. In a fun reversal of typical menus, this one lists the wines available by the glass and offers some suggested pairings of dishes that the chef can whip up.

When visiting the wine country you will need to rent a car, and keep in mind that whole driving on the wrong side of the road thing. My introduction to some of Australia’s finest white wines, especially those made from Riesling, begins in Clare Valley. Most wineries here have tasting rooms, and some even have organized tours. I found some of the more fascinating happenings at the smaller venues like Mount Horrock’s, Grosset, and Knappstein, but don’t neglect the bigger wineries where there might be a chance to sample a bigger selection.

thornpark2There are two absolutely delightful places I recommend for accommodation in Clare Valley. The first, gay owned and operated Thorn Park Country House, is located in the Sevenhill area. Long-time partners David Hay and Michael Speers have put together one of the coolest guest houses at which you’ll ever stay. Beautifully furnished and appointed private rooms are located in a century and half old homestead on 65 acres of rolling hills. Here you can kick back and relax, or take advantage of art and cooking classes offered on site. Deliciously prepared breakfast and dinner are included in the package. (www.thornpark.com.au)

The second place is the gorgeous 19th century Martindale Hall. A perfectly restored and maintained museum home, the rooms are available for rental packages for individuals or small groups. As an active museum, you’ll have to vacate the premises during the day (your belongings safely stowed away), but come evening, dinner is served in formal manor style, and the classic rooms are prepared for sleeping like a nobleman or noblewoman. (www.martindalehall.com)

After enjoying some of the pleasures of Clare Valley, take a short drive over the hills to the Barossa Valley. Here Shiraz is king, and some of Australia’s best examples are available. I wouldn’t dream of missing the tasting rooms at Peter Lehmann, Henschke and Kilikanoon for award winning representatives of the class. Lunch at the famed Bridgewater Mill affords samples of some of the best modern Australian fare in the South. For a Mediterranean-Australian fusion, the Vintner’s Bar & Grill is a great choice.

To arrange an individually planned tour of the region, with a focus on food and wine, contact A Taste of South Australia (www.tastesa.com.au). Whether it’s driving, cycling, hiking or even a private limousine, you can’t beat having people who know the right connections on your team.

If you have the time and feel adventurous, there are other wine regions to explore, including McLaren Vale and the other “Southern Vales“, the Adelaide Hills, Coonawarra and many more. For more information about South Australia visit www.southaustralia.com


Passport magazine is a relatively new, ultra-slick, ultra-hip gay travel magazine. My friends Don Tuthill and Robert Adams, respectively the publisher and editor-in-chief, who have owned and run QSF magazine for many years, launched this publication recently. It has received industry accolades. They asked me to come along and write the occasional article for this venture as well.

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Great Wines For the Discerning Connoisseur

Q San Francisco
September 2002
Pages 44-45

greatwinesdiscerningIt’s hard to be the arbiter of fashion. But somebody’s got to do it. When the question of fashion is not Yohji Yamamoto versus K-Mart, but wine, the average consumer takes one of two well-defined paths. Either leads to the same result.

The first, I shall call the “pansy,” defined by my dictionary as “a man or boy considered childish or unassertive”. There are other definitions, but I’m sticking with this one. A pansy announces, with practiced timidity, a complete lack of knowledge of wine. He then proceeds to order the same wine that he has ordered at every dinner, at every restaurant, for as long as any of his friends can remember. It’s the same wine to be found in his home. Always.

Now, this same individual would never take the same approach to his wardrobe fashion. If so, he’d still be wearing brown Farrah corduroys that are just a little too short, a white shirt buttoned to the throat, and, no doubt, a pocket protector.

The second, I call the “narcissus”, only because I’m in a floral-print mode. This is that person in each of our lives who is in love with the timber of his own voice. He has an opinion on everything, and, regardless of whether soundly based, is going to share it with you. He will order “an amusing little wine which shows great promise.” It will no doubt be the same wine he has ordered at every dinner, at every restaurant…

Now, he wouldn’t be caught dead still wearing his blue blazer with gold buttons and the white shirt with the monogrammed pocket that he used to wear in debate club. Would he?

When I go out shopping for clothing, I’m the first (well, one of the first) to admit that I’m vaguely clueless. I’ve learned to ask for help, usually from whomever is the current boyfriend. They always tell me they have better fashion sense than I do. Maybe they do. All I know is that other than having heard them endlessly discussed, I basically don’t know the difference between D&G and H&M.

So that’s how I end up here, offering up the latest in wine fashion. Because hopefully, somewhere out there, one or more of you will decide not to take the pansy or narcissus fork in the road. You will strike out in fresh directions, creeping over boundaries, taking over the winelist and trying something, new.

For those of you willing to explore, I give you new wines. Trust me, your friends will stare at the new you in awe; much like when you showed up to that soiree in lime-green capri pants and a teal fishnet tank. At least you’ll be drinking good wine.

Over the past few years it has become completely acceptable to drink South African wine. Yet, for most consumers, these wines are still unknown. The grapes are not all that unusual: Chenin Blanc (the main white wine of the Loire Valley in France) and Sauvignon Blanc are the mainstays of the whites and Cabernet Sauvignon, Merlot, Syrah, and Pinotage (South Africa’s unique red crossing of Pinot Noir and Hermitage, the local name for Cinsault) make up the bulk of the reds.

The wines you shouldn’t miss: Ken Forrester Chenin Blanc and his dessert wine “T”; Martin Meinert Cabernet Sauvignon-Merlot blend; de Trafford Chenin Blanc and Shiraz; Fairview Pinotage “Primo”; Spice Route “Flagship” Pinotage and Shiraz; Hamilton Russell Chardonnay and Pinot Noir; Glen Carlou “Grand Classique”; Mulderbosch Sauvignon Blanc; and Fleur du Cap “Noble Riesling” for dessert.

Everyone has heard of Beaujolais, especially in the context of Nouveau when it’s released in late November. And we’ve all drunk our share of these simple, fruity wines made from the Gamay grape. How many of your inner circle know that the Beaujolais region has ten “crus” or declared top-quality vineyards? How many know that there is Beaujolais Blanc and Rosé?

Here is one from each of the crus I know you and your guests will enjoy. On the lighter side, try Domaine Berrod Fleurie, Bernard Santé Chenas, Pascal Granger Julienas, and Christophe Pacalet Chiroubles, Raymond Mathelin et Fils St.-Amour. On the medium to full bodied side, pull the cork on a bottle of Alain Michaud Brouilly, Bernard Dalicieux Moulin-à-Vent, Château Thivin Côte-de-Brouilly, Domaine des Souchons Morgon, Château de Pizay Régnié. And just so you can look especially chic next time you want a Chardonnay, turn to Terres Dorées Beaujolais Blanc.


Q San Francisco magazine premiered in late 1995 as a ultra-slick, ultra-hip gay lifestyle magazine targeted primarily for the San Francisco community. It was launched by my friends Don Tuthill and Robert Adams, respectively the publisher and editor-in-chief, who had owned and run Genre magazine for several years prior. They asked me to come along as the food and wine geek, umm, editor, for this venture as well. In order to devote their time to Passport magazine, their newest venture, they ceased publication of QSF in early 2003.

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Shaping Up For Summer

Q San Francisco
May 2001
Pages 42-43

Shaping Up For Summer
The key to success is a positive attitude and healthy food!

I love going to the gym. I really do. I’m not a body-builder, far from it. I enjoy working up a little sweat and feeling like I’m doing something constructive with my body, but I’m not in it for pain and gain. I like the people watching.

Everyone is getting ready for summer. 24-7-365, they’re getting ready for summer. Doesn’t matter if it’s January 2nd and they’re working off that New Year’s resolution, or it’s Labor Day and they want to look good for the last weekend tea dance.

Mostly, I love the routines that people have worked up for themselves. I’m not talking about the hardcore body-builders, though even some of them have fascinating workouts. I’m talking about the average guy or gal like you and me.

I have a friend who goes to the gym every day – to read the New York Times online. He sits on one of these new high-tech exer-cycles with an Internet hookup and pedals his way through. He manages to get in an hour and a half of bicycling a day. He covers a simulated five miles. He doesn’t pedal too fast, because he wouldn’t be able to read the screen.

Recently, I listened in as two guys talked about doing crunches. One was so proud of his abs, which indeed were rippling away. He told the other how he was managing to make it through a hundred crunches each day. The other, whose abs were somewhere lost beneath a layer of too many doughnuts, decried his genetics. “I do between 500 and 1000 crunches, and look – nothing!

His friend exclaimed in disbelief, so he set out to demonstrate. Somewhere around 50, the youngster with the six-pack murmured that perhaps the crunches would work better if his shoulders actually came up off the mat.

The diets people talk about at the gym are also amusing. I have listened in on tales of Pritikin, Atkins, mastering zones, grapefruit, Fitonics, Suzanne Somers, 5-day Miracles, Beverley Hills, low-fat, high-fat, low-carb, high-carb, low protein, high protein, and cabbage soup. I’ve heard tales of weight loss that range from a pound a month to five pounds a day. Of course, none of them came from people who you’d want modeling in the latest swimsuit issue.

I recently returned from a vacation where I stayed at a clothing optional resort. During the first couple of hours, I couldn’t help myself. Guys who, in my mind at least, shouldn’t have taken their clothes off alone in a dark room were wandering around in the buff. Meanwhile, other men who should have been bronzed and placed on a pedestal were under wraps.

Before long I realized that there was a mix of body types in all categories. As I spent my vacation chatting with and getting to know a good number of these men, I discovered that it really didn’t have a whole lot to do with what they looked like. Some guys are comfortable with little or no clothing, regardless of what their body looks like, others aren’t.

Some of the men who clearly spent hours daily at the gym were obsessed with every perceived flaw that someone might notice. Others were perfectly content to lay it all out in the sun. Men who probably spent gym period in the cafeteria were as likely to heave themselves glistening onto the pool deck or drape their torsos in a caftan.

So here’s the long and short of it. I think it’s all about attitude. You have to be relaxed and happy with who you are. When you’re tense and obsessed, everyone around you knows it. Now, perhaps that means long hours of therapy, deep meditation, spiritual retreats, sensory-deprivation tank time, or a facial at Elizabeth Arden. If, however, you’ve paid any attention to my columns over the past many years, you know that I’m about to recommend food. And why not? If the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach, that should include your own heart. If friendship is promoted by good food and good drink, shouldn’t that start with making friends with yourself? We should put things in our bodies that make us feel good all over. And I don’t mean a tab of ecstasy washed down with mineral water.

As for me, the ultimate “get ready to go out and face my adoring public” meal would probably be a big bowl of hot fudge sauce and something, oh, maybe just my finger, to dip in it. How could you not go out and have a fabulous night after that? But running an awfully close second is a bowl of homemade soup and fresh bread. There’s nothing better for aligning my stars, synching my biorhythms, and just plain gearing up for a night out or a day at the pool.

Here is one of my favorite springtime soups. It is extraordinarily simple to make. It is served cool, not chilled. It is filling, nourishing, and completely sensual in texture.

Cantaloupe-Yukon Gold Soup

1 ripe cantaloupe
1 pound Yukon gold potatoes, peeled
1-2 dried chipotle peppers
1 cup plain yogurt
salt to taste

Unless you’re opening a can, it doesn’t get much easier than this. Boil the potatoes and the chipotle peppers in water until the potatoes are tender. Drain and reserve a little of the cooking liquid. Cut the cantaloupe open, remove the seeds and scoop the melon flesh into a food processor. Puree and then add the potatoes, peppers and yogurt. Process until smooth, if you need to thin it out a little, add some of the reserved cooking liquid. Add salt to taste.

Cool in the refrigerator until it’s a refreshing temperature – a bit colder than an air-conditioned room is just right. You could sprinkle some of your favorite chopped herbs on it – if you can get epazote, a delicious Mexican culinary herb, use that. Serve with flatbread, I like the kind with all sorts of seeds on it…

A note on the bread – if you’re not going to make it yourself, at least go to a bakery and get freshly baked bread. Plastic wrapped slices of preserved, baked flour just don’t cut it in my book. Remember, we want to enjoy the meal!


Q San Francisco magazine premiered in late 1995 as a ultra-slick, ultra-hip gay lifestyle magazine targeted primarily for the San Francisco community. It was launched by my friends Don Tuthill and Robert Adams, respectively the publisher and editor-in-chief, who had owned and run Genre magazine for several years prior. They asked me to come along as the food and wine geek, umm, editor, for this venture as well. In order to devote their time to Passport magazine, their newest venture, they ceased publication of QSF in early 2003.

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Throwing the Perfect Oscar Night Party

Q San Francisco
March 2001
Pages 56-57

Throwing the Perfect Oscar Night Party

martiniglassI have never been nominated for an Academy Award. I’m informed by friends in the know that this relates to my not having acted since a production of ‘Twas the Night Before Christmas in fourth grade. I narrated; Brilliantly, I might add. Regardless, I don’t find myself in possession of one of those golden statuettes, affectionately dubbed “Oscar”. Hollywood’s most enduring symbol of achievement was described by screenwriter Francis Marion as “the ideal symbol… an athletic body… with half its head, that part which held his brains, completely sliced off.” At 13-1/2 inches high it would be just perfect as a centerpiece on my dining table.

The true purpose of the Academy Awards, for those of us living in the forgotten fringe of theater stardom, is to see and be seen. It is far more important to be seen IN an Oscar de la Renta than WITH an Oscar de la Statue. The golden boy on your arm should be slightly more pliable than cast metal, and preferably earning his own paycheck.

In this regard, it is truly the Oscar Party that is more important than the awards ceremony. Who’s at the Governor’s Ball? Who’s at Spago? Who’s at Pagani? Who’s with whom? I might note, nobody’s asking, “what did they eat?” Lets face it, more than one salmon canapé and they’ll start popping out of their Cynthia Rowley gowns. Wolfgang Puck may have roasted his chicken breasts with risotto and black truffles, but it didn’t make the front page. As long as there’s champagne and cocktails, everyone’s happy. Not me. Personally, I can’t tell the difference between a Vera Wang and a Vera Charles; But I’ll whip up a Snapper Veracruz or a Pasta PrimaVera faster than you can fasten your seatbelts. There may be no statuette on my sideboard, but I can put a Veal Oscar in front of you that’ll make you forget about Cher’s new dress.

To throw a fab Oscar party begin by inviting those friends you can make catty comments about the movies with, get a big screen TV, and set up the dining table where you can watch the whole thing while you wine and dine. Also, bring out the good crystal, china and silver service – let’s do this right!

THE NOMINEES ARE…

Start the night off by preparing “real” cocktails, not cosmos and apple-tinis and woo-woos. If you must drink those, please do it in secret. Martinis and Manhattans are perfect for this sort of party; simple, elegant drinks. A couple of notes about Martinis: First, they involve two ingredients, either gin and vermouth or vodka and vermouth. Looking at the vermouth bottle does not constitute making it an ingredient – that’s a glass of vodka or gin, up. I know we’ve all been raised to think a dry martini doesn’t contain the stuff – it does – just less of it. The original martini was 1/3 vermouth. A dry one should be about 1/8. Try it, you might find out that a martini is actually capable of having flavor. Also, let’s put one fallacy to rest her and now, gin doesn’t bruise. You can shake or stir to your heart’s content. The only thing that shaking does is dilute the gin (or vodka). The same will happen if you stir too long.

When it comes to preparing cocktails, always use good quality ingredients. My current faves for vodka: Mor, Van Hoo, and Rain. Save the more commercial brands, albeit good, for cocktails where the other ingredients are providing the flavor. For gins: Old Raj, Tanqueray #10, and Junipero. Noilly Prat makes a good, basic dry vermouth, but you might try one of the new, interesting brands like King Eider or Vya.

In my book, Manhattans contain bitters. Just a couple drops, but like the vermouth in a Martini, they add to the complexity. A Manhattan is also classically made with rye whiskey. Bourbon makes a good drink as well, but for a change of pace, why not try the original?

Again, good quality ingredients are key. For rye, Canadian Club Classic (12 year old) makes a great drink. My favorite, Van Winkle Family Reserve (13 year old). For sweet vermouth I prefer Martini & Rossi. Also give a look at Vya, which makes a unique style.

THE ACADEMY AWARD GOES TO…

Veal Oscar

The classic Veal Oscar is a cutlet of veal topped with white asparagus, crabmeat, and Bearnaise sauce. With a little inspiration from a chef friend, here’s my, slightly different, version. Serves six.

6 thin veal cutlets
1 package of “dashi” flakes (about 5 grams)
3 sheets of “nori”
salt
freshly ground black pepper
3 dozen asparagus spears
1 pound lump crabmeat
½ cup rice flour
2 eggs
1/4 cup cooking oil

Sauce:
juice of two lemons
3 tablespoons stone-ground mustard
2 egg yolks
1 cup olive oil
1 branch of fresh tarragon leaves

Dashi flakes are dried, shaved bonito (a tuna relative) that are used to make broth. Nori sheets are the large green seaweed squares used in making sushi. Both should be available at a good grocery or certainly at any Japanese market.

You will need two small plates and a bowl to prepare. On one plate put the rice flour, on the other, a finely processed (in your food processor) mix of the dashi and nori. In the bowl, lightly beat the two eggs with a couple spoonfuls of water. Season the cutlets with salt and pepper. Coat in the flour, dip in the egg wash, and then coat well with the dashi/nori mix.

Saute in the oil in a large skillet until golden brown on both sides. Place on a warm platter in the oven to hold until ready to serve. Meanwhile, cook your asparagus in just a little water and butter until tender. Season with salt and pepper and reserve on the side.

In your blender, on fairly high speed, whip together the mustard, lemon juice and egg yolks. Gradually add the olive oil – you are basically making a light mayonnaise. At the last moment, drop in the tarragon leaves (not the branch) and process till finely chopped.

In a small pan, warm the crabmeat and when it is hot, stir in enough of the sauce to thoroughly coat the crab. Remove from the heat.

To serve, place a cutlet on each plate, decoratively arrange a half dozen asparagus spears, and top with a good dollop of the crabmeat mixture. Pop a bottle of champagne, or pour another round of cocktails, and seal your bets on Best Picture with a toast.


Q San Francisco magazine premiered in late 1995 as a ultra-slick, ultra-hip gay lifestyle magazine targeted primarily for the San Francisco community. It was launched by my friends Don Tuthill and Robert Adams, respectively the publisher and editor-in-chief, who had owned and run Genre magazine for several years prior. They asked me to come along as the food and wine geek, umm, editor, for this venture as well. In order to devote their time to Passport magazine, their newest venture, they ceased publication of QSF in early 2003.

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ROME: The Eternal City

Q San Francisco
January 1999
Pages 26-30

ROME: The Eternal City
Images Brett Kaufman

roma1

The Colosseum, the Pantheon, the Imperial Fora, the Circus Maximus, the Sistine Chapel, the Borghese Palace, the list goes on and on. These are the ancient places you’ve read about since you were a kid. Welcome to The Eternal City!

Over the course of western literary history, more has been written about Rome than about any other single city on the planet. For the inveterate traveler, wanderer, amateur archaeologist, poet or artist, it is, perhaps, the one “must visit” city. It is hard to imagine a more fascinating assemblage of the ancient and the modern in one place.

During my years of reading about Rome two things always stood out. First, I was led to manifest visions of a city overrun by feral cats. Somehow or other there seemed to be more denizens of the feline variety than the human. When I arrived, I did find cats, scattered here and there, and indeed they do run free, but they tend to remain in small, localized areas of some of the older ruins dotted throughout the city.


“I should like to see Rome,” she said; “it must be a lovely city, or so many foreigners would not be constantly arriving there. Now, do give me a description of Rome. How does the city look when you enter in at the gate?”
– Beauty of Form and Beauty of Mind, Hans Christian Anderson


Second, I was led to believe that Rome existed as a city of fountains–which turned out to be absolutely true. Fountains are everywhere. Most of them are small, not quite nondescript. But the major ones are truly awesome. The foremost spouting water attraction in the world is undoubtedly the Fontana di Trevi, a massive, amazing sculpture of water and marble. A photo in front of this fountain, preferably in the evening when it is beautifully lit, is a must for tourist and Italian alike.

My fountain of choice is Fontana delle Tartarughe. Located in Piazza Mattei, this 16th century fountain has been modified by several major sculptors over time. The graceful sculpture depicts four young boys in the buff assisting four tortoises on their climb into the top of the fountain. The Tartarughe is also located near one end of one of my favorite streets in Rome, Via Giulia, the main street of the old Jewish Ghetto, now home to great little art galleries and design shops.

One of the most popular places to hang out and people watch is Piazza Navona. Crowds of locals and tourists gather round to watch artists and performers do their thing around this multi-block open space.

For myself, Piazza del Popolo is where I go to sit, soak up some sun and watch the world pass by while surrounded by four massive lion fountains that guard the space. Popolo is also known, by those who apparently know such things, as one of the piazzas where gay men and women congregate. Popolo makes a great starting spot for a day of sightseeing, equipped with gothic churches, ancient ruins and a fascinating Italian art museum.

Sightseeing is the major reason to vacation in Rome. There is, of course, the necessary visit to the Vatican Museums, especially the Sistine Chapel. If you don’t want to wait in line forever, get there early, take a walk through the Chapel first, and then go back to the Museums later. (Major tip: Don’t wear shorts or sleeveless shirts when touring Rome, especially in religion related places–Romans are notoriously conservative about mode of dress and will bluntly refuse you admission to most churches, and definitely Vatican City. The same is true of many restaurants.)

roma2If, like me, you are into really ancient ruins, a stop by the Largo Argentina for a look at the four Republican temples is well worth it. This square block area is also home to an amazing number of cats that have overrun the sacred grounds and are now considered kind of sacred themselves. A morning at the Imperial Forum and the Colosseum is impressive, however, access to the latter, and whole sections of the former, is limited because of crumbling rock and restoration attempts.

For the truly classical-oriented, a short train trip out to the 1st century city of Ostia Antica is an absolute must. I spent an entire day there exploring the ancient ruins. Some of the most fascinating mosaics, including a gym floor laid out in black and white tile pictures of naked athletes and an anatomical invitation floor mat at the local bathhouse, are a couple features sure to catch your eye.

Speaking of bathhouses, if you want to see what they were really all about, drop by and spend an hour or two at the Baths of Caracalla near the Circus Maximus. When operational, the Baths–equipped with gym, solarium, sauna, whirlpool and private lounges–handled 1600 people per day. You’ll never look at a modern “health club” the same way again!

If you want to be awed by a monument, go to the Pantheon. Incredibly well preserved and beautiful, it will take your breath away. Dating over two thousand years old, it is in better shape than many buildings built in the last century. While you’re in the neighborhood, you can drop by Piazza Minerva and see one of my favorite statues, a really cute little elephant.

The impressive Spanish Steps (with a great little fountain at the bottom, the scene of much cruising) is also, of course, a must visit. I prefer to start at the top, from where you get a full view of Rome, and walk down, though the fitness buffs among us will want to walk up. From the base of the steps you can hit the major shopping district where you will find every fashion designer in Rome along Via Condotti and Via Borgogna.

If you just want to relax and see some beauty, drop in and wander around the nearby Borghese Park where you can see everything from old villas to statuary, to a small lake, to the stunning Galleria Borghese (by appointment only).

DINING OUT

Food in Italy is, of course, a major concern. Let’s start simply. Coffee. More specifically, espresso. Two places serve exceptional espresso: Sant’Eustachio (82 Piazza Sant’Eustachio) and La Tazza d’Oro (84 Via degli Orfani), both near the Pantheon. Personally, I am a fan of the latter, but try both and decide for yourself. Also, in the late afternoon, La Tazza d’Oro serves a great espresso ice with whipped cream.

Ice cream, well, gelato, is an Italian passion. The most famous and most popular spot to get some frozen heaven is Giolitti at 40 Via Uffici del Vicario; with their array of flavors that makes Baskin Robbins look like amateurs, it’s tough to do much better. There is one exception, San Crispino. With two locations (56 Via Acaia, in the southern suburbs, and 42 Via della Panetteria, by Fontana di Trevi), they serve the most amazing ice cream you will ever have. The owners use only the absolutely best ingredients they can find: their house flavor uses honey from their own bees, their zabaglione flavor uses a twenty year old reserve marsala wine, their scotch flavor uses an eighteen year old single malt–an ethereal experience to say the least.

roma3You’re in Italy, so pizza, right? Not quite what you’re used to at home, but you’ll find the real thing here. Hands down, the best pizza I’ve ever had is from a little hole-in-the-wall called Da Giovanni, at 39 Piazza Campo de’Fiori. Piazza Campo de’Fiori is also one of the coolest places to hang out. There are several coffee bars, several wine bars (including one of the best, La Vineria, at #15), and one of the best open-air food markets you’ll ever visit. The other must see food markets for those who, like me, like to visit them, are at Piazza Vittorio Emanuele and, if you’re in the area of the Vatican, Piazza dell’Unità.

Now back to pizza; rather, Pizza Bianca–which is basically what we call focaccia. Simple, oiled, salted and sometimes herbed pizza dough baked light and delicious. Romans slice these open and fill them with a variety of meats, cheeses, and vegetables. The secret spot to acquire some has no name on the door, people just usually call it the “you know, the no-name focaccia place.” Owned by Salvadore Paladini, and located at 29 Via del Governo Vecchio, this is the one snack place you can’t miss in Rome. Have a Bianca filled with stracchino cheese and arugula while you sip some mineral water and stand around. Then take another one to have with you for when you get hungry later. Maybe stuffed with mortadella and cured Sicilian olives?

Few restaurants in Rome are really great, but almost all that I’ve eaten in are quite good. Here are the four that I would recommend you check out if you have little time and want to sample the best.

For lunch, Sora Margherita, at 30 Piazza delle Cinque Scole. This is a bargain priced osteria serving serious Roman-Jewish fare. Watch for owner Margherita Tomassini to serve you, with a twinkle in her eyes and a casual “signorine” (“ladies”) as she sets your food out.

For a simple dinner and great people watching, head over to the area around Piazza Navona. Hang for a bit and watch the world walk by, then walk down the little side street off the west side of the piazza to the corner of Via delle Pace, #25, and have a drink and dinner outside at Bramante. This savory little place is owned by friend Giuseppe Pecora. Tell him I said, “Buona Sera.”

For a great dinner and an incredible wine selection, you must visit Al Bric at 59 Via del Pellegrino–one of Rome’s newest wine bars that, unlike many wine bars, pays just as much attention to food. While not inexpensive, the selection of great Italian fare and wines is worth the tab. By the way, restaurants in Italy, generally, charge the same as retail stores for wine, so you won’t get hit with outrageous prices for your fave quaff.

Last, but by no means least, one of the best high-end restaurants in Rome is a place called Il Convivio, at 44 Via dell’Orso. Not particularly classic food and not even completely Italian, this restaurant offers more of the cutting edge of cuisine in Rome. If you want to see what a great chef in Rome is doing with modern multi-cultural cuisine, this is the spot you want to hit.

WHERE TO STAY

The fun thing about Roman accommodations is that you can live like a queen or live like a monk. There are plenty of good hotels in Rome ranging from really cheap to really expensive. Expect that hotel rooms will not be particularly large. In general, however, the hotels are clean and well-managed.

Hotel staff in Rome are notoriously helpful for making sure you enjoy your stay. Most hotels provide a Concierge who will get you restaurant reservations, gallery appointments, and provide you with directions and ideas for all sorts of things to do.

roma4If you don’t mind a room in which it’s hard to turn around without bumping into something, I recommend the Rinascimento, conveniently located near Campo dei’Fiori, at 122 Via del Pellegrino. A small (18 room) converted palazzo with modern, clean rooms, this is one of the better bargains you will find in Rome. Another good choice is Hotel Alexandra at 25 Via Veneto–a bigger hotel, with larger rooms, but still relatively inexpensive.

A last note on hotels. Make sure you have reservations and confirmation in advance. Rome is not a great place for people who show up planning to “wing it.” It’s a popular tourist destination and hotels rarely have rooms available for someone who just wanders in off the street.

SPECIAL NOTES FOR THE GAY TOURIST

Start from the following groundrules. This is a major European city controlled by one of the most rigid religious organizations on the planet. Living space is at a premium both in terms of availability and cost. Gay people have a choice of living with their parents till the day they “marry” or sharing a small apartment with way too many people. Friends expect each other to hang together, and they don’t really care about sexual orientation; they’re more interested in the clothes they wear, the movies they just saw, which coffee or wine bar is the present hot spot, and whether the sauce on last night’s pasta was made the way grandma used to make it. (Of course, that’s pretty much what you’re interested in as well!) So, it makes perfect sense that the only gay bars and clubs in Rome are oriented around tourists–nobody local really goes to them except occasionally to dance, or to show friends visiting from elsewhere that there are really gay clubs in Italy.

Generally, gay friends gather around their favorite coffee bar, wine bar, or at some local piazza–every clique has its hang-out. Cruising in Rome is not one of the easier propositions since everyone gives everyone else the once or twice over. It’s just hard to tell if they’re looking at you or at your clothes. There are gay events, dances, lectures, social gatherings. Some of them are by invitation, many are open to whomever wants to attend. The best way to find out is to consult one of the monthly magazines that cover the social scene in Rome. Try glancing through Time Out Rome (English and Italian), or Babilonia (Italian only), a national gay publication that also publishes an annual guide to the entire country in both Italian and English; or drop by Rome’s only gay bookstore, Babele on Via dei Banchi Vecchi just off Via del Pellegrino. The magazines and guides are generally easy to find at street kiosks.

roma5A quick listing of the more popular gay places; everyone knows The Hangar, Rome’s oldest gay bar. The best times to visit are Friday, Saturday, and Monday late evenings. American owned, it is probably the most popular (and one of the easier to find), with a primarily tourist clientele, though a lot of the Gen-X age Romans hang there too. A great address too: Number 69, Via in Selci, near the Colosseum. Nearby you’ll find L’Apeiron (5 Via dei Quattro Cantoni), a two level club big on music videos. For dancing, there are two major places: L’Alibi in the Testaccio district, at 44-57 Via di Monte Testaccio, near the Pyramide; and L’Angelo Azzuro, at 13 Via Merry del Val.

Except for the above-mentioned places, gay spots seem to open and close with such rapidity they would leave the Tasmanian Devil dizzy. Even a just acquired, up-to-date listing probably warrants a phone call to ensure that any given club is actually still there. Bars and clubs are also notoriously difficult to find. Most are hidden behind plain facades with little if any indication that you are in the right spot. They also tend to be in either out-of-the-way neighborhoods or somewhat seedy locales.

OUT & ABOUT IN THE CITY

A few notes about getting around Rome. First, you will probably arrive at Fiumicino Airport. Unless you’ve got an incredible amount of luggage, don’t take a cab into the city. It’s not a short drive and it will blow a huge hole in your budget. There’s a direct train line into the center of the city, you can take either a local or express, each no more than a few dollars. From Stazione Termini you can then take a cab, bus, or metro. Cabs, again, are not cheap, but depending on where you need to go, they may be your only reasonable option.

The bus system covers the entire city extremely well, but it can be incredibly slow, incredibly packed (especially close to rush hour), and very confusing. It is, however, only 1500 lire, less than a dollar. The metro, or subway, consists of two lines that cross the heart of Rome. To get to any of the major sightseeing spots, this is probably your best choice other than your own two feet. I’m a big fan of walking around Rome. It’s not laid out in “a grid” like many American cities, so it can be a bit bewildering, but you’ll discover some amazing little piazzas and sights as you wander.

A caveat about public transportation. It’s operated on the honor system. You buy tickets from machines and walk through open gateways or climb onto buses through doors that are not necessarily close to the driver. You are supposed to punch your ticket in little stamping machines located near these gates or doors. The ticket is time-stamped and is then good for 75 minutes. Within that time period, should someone official ask to see your ticket, you’re in good shape. You’ll see that a large number of locals don’t bother to buy or punch tickets at all and take a chance that nobody will ask to see their ticket. They’re probably right. But it’s a major fine if you’re caught without one that is stamped.

As far as I’m concerned, the one indispensable guide to wandering around Rome is The Blue Guide to Rome (Norton). This 400 page, regularly updated guide covers not only detailed instructions for getting to and from places, but detailed historical and cultural notes and tips. It also includes pretty decent maps that detail the core of Rome.


Q San Francisco magazine premiered in late 1995 as a ultra-slick, ultra-hip gay lifestyle magazine targeted primarily for the San Francisco community. It was launched by my friends Don Tuthill and Robert Adams, respectively the publisher and editor-in-chief, who had owned and run Genre magazine for several years prior. They asked me to come along as the food and wine geek, umm, editor, for this venture as well. In order to devote their time to Passport magazine, their newest venture, they ceased publication of QSF in early 2003.

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Summer Parties

Q San Francisco
April/May 1996
Pages 44-45

Summer Parties

You have an incredible terrace with the best view in the city. It is modest, however, limited to accommodating no more than forty of your closest, dearest friends. Your budget will not allow for any more than a few kilos of caviar and certainly no more than three cases of Dom Perignon – in magnums.

From my fire escape (comfortably seating two) overlooking the local chapter of the Hell’s Angels parking strip, I will, however, try to advise. My delightfully spacious studio apartment makes a swell place for a gathering of eight close friends, or six casual acquaintances. For my last summer party I invited fifty. Many of them brought dates. It was a raging success.

Summer parties en appartement are based on the well-known economic principle “KYSSS” — Keep Your Soiree Simple, Sweetheart! You need a theme. It doesn’t have to be something exotic like requiring everyone wear red or tropical fruit hats, or serving Hawaiian barbecue from a pit dug in your very own windowbox.

At my last party I chose Italian wine and cheese. I sent out incredibly witty invitations with Dante’s inscription from over the gates of Hell (in both the original Latin and an English translation) and a sketch of the leaning tower. I served Italian wine, beer, cheese, olives and those great hot cherry peppers stuffed with parmesan and prosciutto. There were still hangers-on when the sun broke the horizon.

Select your food and wine in keeping with your theme. There are, in my view, a few “musts.” A crudite plate: raw vegetables, fruit, and some kind of dip. Cheese: even though I have to pop lactase pills to eat the stuff, I love it. Bready, crackery, chippy kinds of things with dip. And, of course, something sweet like cookies or brownies.

You’ll have to figure out decorations, party favors, and your own ensemble yourself. I’ve been wearing black since the late 1970s. Not because I was anticipating its trendiness in the 1990s, but because I don’t have to worry about coordinating anything with anything else. I saw a picture of someone wearing a striped tie with an identically striped shirt the other day. My boyfriend, a designer, said it was okay. I don’t know, it looked awfully complicated to me.

Enough rambling. Let’s get onto some food and wine favorites for summer partying.


tomatoesYou have an incredible terrace with the best view in the city. It is modest, however, limited to accommodating no more than forty of your closest, dearest friends. Your budget will not allow for any more than a few kilos of caviar and certainly no more than three cases of Dom Perignon – in magnums.

Aioli Dip

Been there, done that, bought a t-shirt. It’s a classic — no one ever turns it down. A favorite for dipping those veggies.

8 cloves of garlic
1/4 cup fresh Italian parsley leaves
4 egg yolks
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/8 teaspoon white pepper
Juice of 2 lemons
2 cups extra virgin olive oil

In a food processor whip yolks, salt and lemon juice until pale and thick.
Slowly drizzle oil in through the top.
Don’t pour too quickly or it will separate.
When all the oil is in, you should have a thick sauce – hey, you’ve just made your first homemade mayonnaise!
Continue processing and drop in the garlic and parsley.
Blend thoroughly and then refrigerate for at least 30 minutes to combine flavors.
Makes about 2-1/2 cups.


Smoky Yellow Salsa Dip

This one is a favorite at our parties – it’s just different enough to stop those chip-dippers in their tracks.

3 large yellow tomatoes
1/2 cup finely diced fresh pineapple
1 or 2 yellow habanero peppers
1 yellow bell pepper
1 large Spanish onion
Juice of 2 limes
1/2 cup extra virgin olive oil
1/4 cup chopped fresh mint leaves
1/4 teaspoon liquid smoke
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon ground pink peppercorns

Roast bell and hot peppers over an open flame (hopefully you don’t have an electric stove) and rotate until skin blisters.
Cool and peel.
Meanwhile, peel and seed tomatoes.
Finely dice tomatoes, pineapple, peppers and onion.
Add lime juice, olive oil, mint leaves and liquid smoke
(okay, it’s cheating, but are you going to buy a food smoker just to make salsa?).
Season with salt and pepper (if you can’t find pink peppercorns, use black or white but only 1/4 teaspoon).
Makes about 3 cups.


Chocolate-Lemon Squares

Since we’ve got this sort of yellow thing going, I thought I’d go with a favorite that bolsters the theme.

Crust:
1 stick of butter
1/4 cup sugar
1-1/4 cups flour
1 egg
1 teaspoon powdered cocoa

Chocolate Filling:
4 ounces bittersweet chocolate, chopped
1/2 cup half-and-half or cream
1 egg
pinch of salt

Lemon Filling:
1/4 cup flour
1/2 teaspoon baking powder
1/8 teaspoon salt
2 eggs
1 cup sugar
Juice and grated zest of 2 lemons

For crust, cream butter and sugar together (food processor is fine for this), add flour, egg and cocoa and process or mix until blended.
Grease and flour 9-inch square baking pan.
Press crust into pan and bake at 375¡F for 10-15 minutes until firm and lightly golden.
For chocolate filling, bring half-and-half to boil and pour over chopped chocolate. Let sit for five minutes.
Whisk together thoroughly. Beat egg lightly with salt and quickly mix into chocolate cream. It will immediately begin to thicken.
Pour over crust.

For lemon filling, beat two eggs with sugar and lemon juice.
Sift flour, baking powder and salt together.
Stir in egg mixture and add lemon zest.
Pour carefully and slowly over chocolate layer.
Layers will swirl a little bit together, but won’t completely mix up.
Reduce heat in oven to 325°F and bake for 25-30 minutes until firm and lightly golden on top.
Cool, cut into squares (6×6 gives 36 good-sized squares) and serve.


Summer Wine Picks

corkscrewSummer is a time for crisp, light wines with lots of zip and character. Well-chilled Sauvignon blancs are my favorites for hot day drinking. Choices should be “as young as possible,” with wines from the southern hemisphere being 1995 vintage and from the northern, generally the 1994s. Here are my round-the-world picks for this year

Starting in the down-under part of the globe, Cloudy Bay in New Zealand makes a ripe, rich Sauvignon that is best described as “raspberries climbing out of the glass.” Nearby Stoneleigh is similar but a little leaner with a more “green” character. A good part of the way around the world, from South Africa, the unpronounceable, but basically unbeatable, Buitenverwachting Sauvignon blanc is minerally, grassy, and perfect for summer drinking. Running a close second is the entry from Mulderbosch. Also from the deep south, Chile delivers up the tart and tasty Santa Rita Reserva. The runner-up, Miguel Torres, a top Spanish producer who was one of the earliest investors in the rejuvenation of the Chilean wine industry.

Moving north and way east, the French entries that grabbed my attention most recently were the Domaine Fernand Girard Sancerre “La Garenne” and the Domaine de la Charmoise Touraine “Cuvee M.” Unfortunately, my top choice for California Sauvignon blanc is not available on the market — the Araujo Estate “Eisele Vineyard” may just be one of the best to come out of the state. But coming in close behind, latch onto the latest offerings from Sanford if you love that herbal, lean style, or, if you prefer a richer, fuller style, try the new release of the Peter Michael “L’Apres Midi.”


Q San Francisco magazine premiered in late 1995 as a ultra-slick, ultra-hip gay lifestyle magazine targeted primarily for the San Francisco community. It was launched by my friends Don Tuthill and Robert Adams, respectively the publisher and editor-in-chief, who had owned and run Genre magazine for several years prior. They asked me to come along as the food and wine geek, umm, editor, for this venture as well. In order to devote their time to Passport magazine, their newest venture, they ceased publication of QSF in early 2003.

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Seduction Dinner

Q San Francisco
February/March 1996
Pages 42-43

Seduction Dinner

The lights are low. No, the lights are off. Candles lit on a beautiful cloth draped table. Crystal glasses. China plates. Real silver. Your best Peggy Lee album is moaning away in the background. The date of your dreams is already sitting at the table.

This is not the moment to bring out the reheated takeout food from the shop down the street. This is your moment to star, to shine, to seduce. You want to be loved not only for you, but your culinary prowess. You want to be introduced to friends not only as cute, smart, and funny, but as someone who can cook, too.

It should look like you worked at it. And you should use every aphrodisiac known to man. Well, at least a few of them. Oysters, caviar, roses, chocolate. Sounds like a winner. I’m going to make this as painless as possible. A four-course seduction dinner that can be made by anyone, whether frying pan challenged or a whisk master.

I should warn you. This is a no expense spared dinner. After all, this is a special night. What’s a couple of weeks’ paychecks in exchange for eternal (or at least a long weekend) happiness? You spent more last month on club entrance fees.

First, the oysters and caviar. Actually, first, the champagne. Pop for a half bottle of Krug Grand Cuvèe. If you want to go domestic, and/or a bit less pricey, and make a subtle (not very) hint, pour out some Iron Horse Vineyards Blanc de Noirs “Wedding Cuvee.” Now just skip dinner and go straight for the bedroom…

Most importantly, have your fishmonger open the oysters for you. There’s nothing worse than struggling to open a dozen fresh oysters in your own kitchen. You probably don’t have an oyster blade and it’s no fun anyway. Just buy them that afternoon.

Now the best thing you could have here would be one of those great cast iron plates on a wood base like you get at the local Sizzler. Otherwise, use a heavy pan. Cover the plate or pan with the salt, about 1/8 inch deep. Set the oysters, each on a half shell, into the salt. Drizzle with champagne. Top with a quick grind of white pepper. Throw it all in a 450 degree oven for five minutes till the oysters just firm up. Top each with a small (demitasse) spoonful of caviar, and serve you and your intended a half dozen apiece.

The next course is the easiest one. It’s taken from an old Italian recipe. I think old Italian women use it to snare husbands for their daughters. It works on non-Italians too.

You have to pluck the rose. That’s all there is to it. It will be a moment to indulge in your Morticia Adams fantasies. Pull those petals right off the flower. Rinse them and dry them.

I prefer serrano ham to prosciutto, but I leave it up to you. Spread the slices out in a fan on your nicest china salad plate. Drizzle with oil and vinegar. Coarsely crack the peppercorns and sprinkle over the plate. Casually strew some marjoram leaves and rose petals over the dish. Serve.

To bring out the rose and spice flavors in this dish, I recommend a Gewurztraminer. This grape is often referred to as the “Don Juan of Alsace,” Alsace being its ancestral home. Women (and occasionally men) are said to swoon just from a sip. My favorite from Alsace comes from Marcel Deiss at his Altenberg vineyards. If your aim is a little closer to home try the Martinelli or Sakonnet Vineyards Gewurztraminer, respectively from California and Rhode Island.

The main course is always the hardest, which is why I left the first two easy. Combining the proverbial partridge, an aphrodisiacal bird if ever there was one, and chocolate, which may just be the queen of seduction, this classic Spanish recipe had better turn the trick, as it were…

If you can’t get partridges, well, let’s face it, you’re not the shopper we thought you were. You can, however, substitute one game hen and split it. Rub the birds with one of the tablespoons of oil. Bake in a roasting pan at 375 degrees for half an hour.

Meanwhile, saute the garlic and onion in the remaining two tablespoons of oil till just golden. Add the wine and cook till it pretty much evaporates. Add the remaining ingredients and simmer over low heat for half an hour. When the birds have baked for thirty minutes, take them out and put them in the pan with the sauce. Continue to simmer, turning the birds, for another 15 minutes. Serve.

This dish calls for something a bit bold to go with the chocolate, garlic and onions in the sauce, but elegant enough for both the partridges and the mood of the evening. Coming from the Bordeaux side of the world, I’d pick Chateau Kirwan from Margaux. From way south of our borders, Bodegas Weinert Cabernet Sauvignon would be high on my list. And for those inclined domestically, I think I’d grab a bottle of William Baccala Estate Merlot.

For dessert, I recommend going light. Remember, you want to have enough energy for after dinner activities. We’ve already filled up with three dishes of food. Poached fruit is the way to go. And what could be more classically seductive than figs and honey?

Melt butter in frying pan over low heat and gently saute the figs for 2 minutes. Mix honey, amaretto and nutmeg together and add to pan. Simmer until amaretto has evaporated and sauce is thickened. Serve warm with a large spoonful of whipped cream. Save the rest of the whipped cream for your after dinner activities.

This is a moment for a small glass of classic sherry. This dish works especially well with E. Lustau Solera Reserva “San Emilio.” In the “also works” category would be a top Vin Santo from Italy, the most prized of which would be Avignonesi Vin Santo Occhio del Pernice. George Bernard Shaw once said, “There is no love sincerer than the love of food.” Starting from there, just imagine your second date…

Seduction Dinner – Appetizer
12 fresh oysters
1 small tin of sevruga or oscetra caviar
a dash of white pepper
Coarse grain salt
1/4 cup of champagne

Seduction Dinner – Antipasto

1/4 pound of thinly sliced serrano ham or prosciutto
1 pink rose
Fresh marjoram leaves
Mixed color whole peppercorns
Good balsamic vinegar
Extra virgin olive oil

Seduction Dinner – Main Course

2 partridges, thoroughly cleaned
3 tablespoons olive oil
1 small onion, finely chopped
2 garlic cloves, minced
1/2 cup dry white wine
1 tablespoon sherry or balsamic vinegar
1/2 cup chicken stock
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon black pepper
2 cloves
1/2 teaspoon thyme leaves
1 small bay leaf
1/8 teaspoon cinnamon
1 ounce unsweetened chocolate

Seduction Dinner – Dessert

4 ripe figs, quartered
1/4 cup honey
1/4 cup amaretto
2 tablespoons butter
1/8 teaspoon nutmeg
2 cups whipped cream


Q San Francisco magazine premiered in late 1995 as a ultra-slick, ultra-hip gay lifestyle magazine targeted primarily for the San Francisco community. It was launched by my friends Don Tuthill and Robert Adams, respectively the publisher and editor-in-chief, who had owned and run Genre magazine for several years prior. They asked me to come along as the food and wine geek, umm, editor, for this venture as well. In order to devote their time to Passport magazine, their newest venture, they ceased publication of QSF in early 2003.

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Uncorked

Q San Francisco
Fall 1995
Pages 42-43

Uncorked

uncorkedIt takes neither wine geek nor fashion queen to figure out that champagne is the classic match for black tie and ball gowns. But then, like a string of pearls, champagne goes with everything. What do you don while sipping a glass of Cabernet? And what do you drink when attired in your best club kid vinyl? The wine of the late seventies was Chablis. The mode of dress, denim and flannel. In the eighties we turned to California Chardonnay and those scrawny little iridescent ties. Halfway through the nineties, the rage is plastic and Merlot. Are these fashion faux pas? Should the fashion police be called? Enquiring minds want to know. Behind-the-seams and behind-the-stems, a definitive guide to the properly bedecked body when lofting stemware is long overdue.

The Definitive Guide to Wine Apparel

Plastic & Rubber: This is clothing at its most high-tech. You find yourself wearing black vinyl shorts, green rubberized PVC boots and a see-through orange jacket vaguely reminiscent of the notebook cover your mother bought you for 7th grade. You have rings on your fingers and bells on your toes, not to mention rubber O-rings on your wrists and elsewhere.

This is not a time to go for classic vintages. This is not a time for elegance and delicacy. You want bold, up-front, high-tech winemaking at its best. You’re also on a budget ’cause that outfit cost you three weeks of paychecks. Think screwtop. Think White Zinfandel. Pack a handful of those airline-size bottles in your clutch or Scooby- Doo lunchbox and you’ll make club kid of the week. Make sure to take along a couple of those bendy straws.

Metal: This is a tough one. Metal can be subtle or bold. Silver or gold. A mere medallion attached to a cap or an entire steel mesh sleeveless T. It can be whisper quiet and heavy or jangle when you walk. Most importantly, metal makes a statement that can’t be ignored. And that’s your key to a wine match. You don’t do what’s usual. You’re on the cutting edge of fashion and you’re ready for the cutting edge of wine. This is the moment for the hottest trends around. With white metal – California Viognier. Even in wine circles this sizzling style is hush-hush. There’s just so little to go around. Snap some up! Decked in gold, brass, bronze and copper? Cash in on the red-hot button – Washington State Merlot. You couldn’t be any trendier if you wore iron body armor.

Leather: Okay, let’s face it. Leather has been, is, and probably always will be part of our community. Except, of course, for those who feel it should be left attached to the body of its original owner. We’re not talking about a belt, shoes, or even a tasteful and oh-so trendy faux motorcycle jacket. This is for those of you who deck yourselves in pants, chaps, vests, jackets, boots, and, yes, even hoods. After all, even in a dungeon one needs to stop for refreshment now and then. You love the smell of old leather and you like it a little rough. Grab for Rhone and Rioja red. Big, earthy, leathery wines, full of fruit, spice and power. Forget the corkscrew. Knock the top off and drink it straight from the bottle.

Denim: Farmers may have worn blue jeans first, but we made ’em an industry. Not only did we take the classic LEVI and turn it into a fashion trend, but we insisted on eighty-two different styles and every color of the rainbow. From shiny new to stonewashed, rough-and- ready to soft and brushed, denim is our most ubiquitous fabric. Pants, shirts, jackets. There’s a good chance you don’t know anyone who doesn’t have at least one piece of clothing made from it. Denim virtually begs for the most widely known grape variety out there. Chardonnay. You can’t miss. Whether it’s a tight, lean styled Chablis with your form-fit zipped boot jeans, a polished, elegant white Burgundy with your brushed cotton jacket, or a bold, buttery California Chard with your button-fly baggies, no other wine fits your lifestyle so well.

Suede, Corduroy & Velvet: Not that they’re all the same thing, but each has that soft, full-bodied, sensual element to them. My high school graduation picture shows me wearing an orange shirt and a dark tan corduroy jacket. I think I’ve destroyed all the copies. But these fabrics have their place. Blue suede shoes, black corduroy pants and a violet, velvet smoking jacket (no shirt or an open white ruffled pirate shirt, of course) call for hedonism in a wine. No wine is as sexy, as sensual, as carnal as Pinot Noir. The paramount red grape of Burgundy draws you in with its earthy manner only to envelope you in its soft embrace. From South Africa there is smoke and heat and passion emanating from each bottle. And from the Pacific Northwest of the good old U.S. of A., a wine as bright, energetic and enthusiastic as a roll in the hay.

Silk: While we’re steaming up the mirrors here… this is another fabric that is pure ardor. From nightwear to boxer shorts, from suit and tie, to a simple, softly draped shirt, silk calls for a soft, caressing elegance. Silk may be the most misunderstood fabric. Your dry cleaner doesn’t know how to clean it. People make fun of you when you wear it. But oh, it feels so good. It’s time to introduce yourself to the most misunderstood wine of all time. Famed wine writer Jancis Robinson said of it, “Unbeatable quality; indisputably aristocratic. Ludicrously unfashionable.” That could describe silk, but no, she was referring to Riesling. Not the vaguely sweet stuff the Germans flooded our markets with over the last few decades, but the good stuff they kept for themselves. Serve a bottle of a dry, top quality wine from the Rhein or Mosel, and then let your silk dressing-gowned companions tell you they don’t like Riesling.

Wool: There’s nothing quite like a warm woolen sweater, perhaps pink angora, or a tailor-made suit, preferably not mohair. Wool is the archetype, from the preppie look to dress-up to spending a weekend in the country – playing polo or some such… A classic calls for a classic. Bordeaux will always be correct with wool. Rich, luxurious, full- bodied and age-worthy. Just like you.

Last, but not least, the electric blue iridescent tie, three-quarters of an inch wide, that we all still secretly have in our closets. Possibly, just possibly, a wine spritzer. But my recollection is that in truth, it wasn’t wine, but the Alabama Slammers that my friend Michael used to make that went best. See you in the wine bars.

Uncorked Picks

White ZinfandelIt may actually be an oxymoron to have a favorite White Zinfandel, and I must admit, I don't. I recomend grabbing whatever's closest to the cash register, you don't have time to waste worrying about brand names.
California ViognierThe two top of the line choices in my tongue's eyes are Preston Vineyards and Alban Vineyards.
Washington State MerlotFirst place honors go to Canoe Ridge Vineyards, with a close runner-up status to Hogue Cellars.
Rhône redFrom the northern Rhône, Michel Ogier Côte Rôtie or Robert Michel Cornas. From the southern Rhône, Père Anselme Gigondas or J. Vidal-Fleury Vacqueyras.
Rioja redGo for the Bodegas La Rioja Alta Viña Ardanza Réserva or Bodegas Montecillo Viña Monty Gran Reserva.
ChardonnayThis is much too wide a category for any flat out top choices, but within each of my recommended styles, here goes a shot at it... Chablis - R. Vocoret "Les Clos" Grand Cru.
White BurgundyDarnat "Clos Richemont" Meursault Premier Cru. California - Mayacamas or Kistler.
Pinot NoirAgain, too much going on in this category, but... Burgundy - Baron de la Charrière Maranges or Santenay. South Africa - Hamilton-Russell. Pacific Northwest USA - Benton Lane or Domaine Drouhin from Oregon, Acacia or Mahoney Estate from California.
RieslingLook for the producers K. Neckerauer or Weingut Lingenfelder. Unless of course, you really want to search out Freiherr zu Knyphausen Erbacher Michelmark?
BordeauxOn a budget? Look for Château Simard, Château Meyney, or Château Bourgneuf. Willing to put out a couple more bucks? Château Kirwan or Château Cos d'Estournel.

Dan Perlman is a chef and sommelier. In 1994 he won the tri-annual competition for Best Sommelier in the Northeastern United States from the Sommelier Society of America.


Q San Francisco magazine premiered in late 1995 as a ultra-slick, ultra-hip gay lifestyle magazine targeted primarily for the San Francisco community. It was launched by my friends Don Tuthill and Robert Adams, respectively the publisher and editor-in-chief, who had owned and run Genre magazine for several years prior. They asked me to come along as the food and wine geek, umm, editor, for this venture as well. In order to devote their time to Passport magazine, their newest venture, they ceased publication of QSF in early 2003.

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